Your smell on me, like tree bark
And still I watch and beg
Eyes up with the Gods, I long
I'm holding up for a miracle
But when I hide inside your arms,
(That's the first time I did that)
I hide like a little girl
Little broken girl in magic garden
Where trees that love me
Make space in their bark
And hold me
They all smell like you
No one could be you for me
I'd never felt that safe
Not that I always felt held
Not that I always felt safe
But in this way that you hold me
In that way that you held me
Safe enough to be wretched
You wanted to see everything I hid
And I hid everything I didn't know about
I had only been loved by hiding and pleasing
Neglected the tar
Overlooked the sour
And to be loved by you, I should
Have hid, have lied purposefully
But, accepting the demands
(you have no strength to deal with),
I didn't
And so I grew, by dying
Which I do so well
You don't
I betrayed the hurt
I performed the less with you
And still, I didn't see myself
I grew so much, I am
But there's no meaning in it if you don't hold me like you.
What do I smell like to you, my love?
There's little joy, but so much meaning
In not being falsely held by you
You pretend to warn, but only to redeem yourself
That's why you warn so much, so loudly
It's the building of an alibi
That's why you go after the ones that have that soft spot
Or are already in love with you
So they don't really leave
They make their excuses for you
And you pretend to be sad
Pretend to want to give more
As you keep on feeding
The least erotic vampire
